Word on the Street

Human Victory Cigar (hyoo’-muhn vik’-tuh-ree si’-gahr) noun. The 12th man on a basketball team, usually exiled to the end of the bench until the team is involved in a major blowout and there are only a few minutes left in the game.

Usage example:If your team is up by 40 with two mintues to go, the Human Victory Cigar will probably enter the game. Probably. Well, maybe.

Word trivia: The NBA has been blessed with a numerous and varied array of Human Victory Cigars over the years: Greg Kite, Uwe Blab, Mike Smrek, Scott Hastings, Joe Kleine, Ed Nealy, Jack Haley …and many, many, many more. But Darko Milicic is today’s preeminent HVC, and a living symbol that if you can’t learn to do something well, you should probably learn to enjoy watching other people do it instead. Darko was (infamously) selected by the Pistons in the first round of the 2003 NBA Draft ahead of other All-Star caliber players such as Carmelo Anthony, Chris Bosh, and Dwyane Wade, making him the worst second overall draft pick since Sam Bowie.

Unless the Pistons are up 30, the warmups never even come off.

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Labels: Greg Kite / Uwe Blab / Mike Smrek / Scott Hastings / Joe Kleine / Ed Nealy / Jack Haley / Darko Milicic / Carmelo Anthony / Chris Bosh / Dwyane Wade / Detroit Pistons / 2003 NBA Draft / NBA All-Star / NBA / Word on the Street

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