Word on the Street

Manscaping (man’-skayp’-ing) noun. The artful “landscaping” of a male athlete’s body by shaving, trimming, waxing, or brushing the body hair.

Usage example:Dirk Nowitzki’s post-game celebration (see below) showed the world that he does, indeed, participate in manscaping.

Word history: The earliest citation of the term “manscaping” appeared in an August 29, 2003 Sacramento Bee article titled “Sign us all up for our makeovers.” The author, Anita Creamer (I’m not making that last name up), is not credited for inventing the term, but she was probably the first to use it in print. The term gained widespread popularity in association with the Queer Eye For The Straight Guy reality show, in which it was revealed that gay men enjoy removing any and all body hair from themselves and others. It was probably around the same time that we at Silent Assassin started noticing the near-to-complete lack of armpit hair among NBA basketball players. This is especially noticable among the white players. I’m not trying to turn this into a racial thing, but if you’re a slow, moderately tall white man (such as myself) who plays pick-up hoops at the local courts, then you know white players tend to have pits full of matted, tangled, stringy, sweaty hair. Basically, imagine having Chris Kaman‘s hair, only in your armpit instead of on your head. The fact that you never see that sort of thing in the NBA tells me that either A) aliens are harvesting armpit hair from our mightiest athletes as part of some body hair-related conquest of the Earth, or B) professional basketball players are participating in some rather unmanly manscaping activities. And hey, I’m all for it. The last thing I want to see is somebody’s knotted, dripping pit monster on television. But it’s still kind of fruity.

Those pits are smoother than a baby’s bottom. Which is wrong on so very many levels.

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Labels: Dirk Nowitzki / Chris Kaman / NBA / Word on the Street

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